Mia the Big Sister

Mia has adjusted well to being a big sister.

She is very caring and loving, giving her sister kisses and squeezes and touching her cheeks or hands.  She's protective of her too, not wanting too many other people to kiss or pick up the baby. 

We have had a few wobbles where she wanted my attention while I was busy attending to Ella, and one afternoon, I think on the second or third day that we were home from hospital, both girls woke up at exactly the same time from their nap, and Mia was quite emotional at not having me be able to lie down and snuggle her like I usually do when she wakes up.

One day when Wyn asked Mia where's mommy, she answered, "playing Ella-Ella", which I found a little bit funny, but a little bit sad too, that she saw it that way.

The first day I kept trying to tell Mia to talk softer, don't shout, shhhh, be quiet the baby is sleeping... and then I realised I was going to drive myself insane having to tell her that every few minutes, so decided to just leave it - for now Ella sleeps through all the noise, and when it gets to a time that she's sensitive to it, she'll have to sleep in her cot and not in the pram downstairs.

Mia helps with fetching me nappies, towels, blankets.  She stands on a little step when we bath Ella and helps with that too.  My mom got Mia a new dolly for her to play with, but she hasn't been super keen on playing much mommy-mommy yet.

I've tried to keep Mia as involved as possible, so whenever I breastfeed then Mia sits on the bed with us, either building pillow houses or playing games on the tablet.

We're also doing our best to keep Mia's routine as close to the way it's always been as possible, especially in the mornings, the way I dress her for school and have breakfast with her, and then in the evenings the way she has a bath and then I dress her and read her a bedtime story and lie with her for a few minutes. It doesn't always work out - a few mornings I've needed Sonja the domestic worker to give her breakfast, and a few evenings Wyn has had to put her to bed.

Some days Mia still challenges us lots, pushing boundaries, not listening to requests, telling us "no" when we tell her it's bath time/sleep time.  This remains a frustration for me, especially now when I feel I'm tired, then my patience runs out quickly...  But I still pick my battles, some things I let go and others become a fight which end in tears (sometimes not only on Mia's side!)  I still feel this is a stage she's going through, 3-year olds just don't listen always, I know. But hoping it improves soon.

 Something that has been working well for us, is that on weekends Mia and I do a Mia-and-Mommy outing while Wyn stays home with Ella, or else Wyn just looks after Ella and I have an afternoon nap with Mia.  Both the outings and the naps are blissful, Mia and I cherish these special times together. 

I know Mia can't wait for Ella to be able to play with her, what a pity it's still going to be quite a while!  Mia shares her toys with Ella, putting toys on top of her or next to her the whole time - and also trying to share her food with her, a few times both Wyn and I have had to quickly intervene before Ella got given a penguin biscuit or a piece of chocolate stuffed into her mouth, oops!

Mia's teacher told me she is very proud of her new sister and often talks about "Baby Ella".  She even has me referring to Ella as "Baby Ella"! 

Another big challenge, has been that Mia suddenly stopped having her afternoon naps.  This is more a case of Fear of Missing Out, than of not being tired...  It started while I was in hospital, that she refused to sleep when my mom-in-law tried to get her to nap.  And once I came home she didn't want to nap, she wanted to see what I'm doing and what baby is doing...  Although when I nap with her she falls asleep very quickly! Mostly I just give up, because it's such a fight to get her to sleep, and she insists on reading her a story, so it becomes a drawn-out lengthy process...  But I do feel she still needs her nap, as she's often very moody and extra disobedient in the evenings if she didn't nap.

I'm doing my best to ensure Mia still gets as many hugs and kisses from me as always - I don't need to divide my hugs and kisses, I can hand out double as many now! ;-)  I also make sure to compliment and encourage her as much as possible, telling her I'm proud of her, that she's my big girl, that I love kisses from her, that she's so beautiful, that I love her face. ♥