Ella has officially decided she's done with the boob. After three weeks of only doing one feed per day in the morning, she has refused to latch the last three days.
I was feeling quite heartbroken and emotional about it this morning, but after much contemplation, I have made peace with it. I made it to 16 weeks, and although I had hoped for a couple more months, at least she did start off quite well with mommy's liquid gold.
Breastfeeding Ella was such a different experience to breastfeeding Mia! Can read my blog post about breastfeeding Mia here.
I think what happened was, Mia breastfed so often, it kept my supply stimulated and sufficient. I don't think Ella fed enough, and the low milk supply caused her lots of frustration at how hard she had to work to drink. There were already lots of milk ducts that didn't work due to being damaged after my breast reduction op from 10 years ago. So actually having been able to have breastfed at all was already lucky!
I can still snuggle her and hold her close as she drinks her bottle, so I'm not worried about the "closeness" that breastfeeding brings, I know we're snugglebugs enough! I am sad that she's not getting all the good antibodies and probiotics that a mother's milk naturally supplies. I'm sad I didn't wean her based on my decision and on my terms...
Feeding time is at least much faster now that it's only a bottle, which helps a lot, especially when I'm doing my best to give both baby and pre-schooler lots of attention!
Also, now I have my body back to myself, after 9 months of pregnancy and 3 months of breastfeeding!
Bittersweet, everything just goes so fast. We've got the introduction of solids coming up in the next couple of weeks, wow!